Divorce and Depression

Grief and divorce are closely tied together. Identifying the stages that you may go through can help you prevent or see when depression may strike as you go through divorce.

• Many people relate death to divorce. The loss of someone you once loved can make you feel that not only has someone you loved is no longer with you but that a part of you has also died. Learning how to pick yourself up and take one day at a time can help you take the time you need to relearn a different way of life.
• Realizing a part of your life has stopped and you will need to regroup, pick up the pieces, and continue with life as though everything is the same as the day before can create a very unrealistic expectation. Take time for yourself. Life does not need to change overnight. Neither do you. However, set a date when you will say enough is enough. You may not feel perfect but you will move forward with your life. Keeping yourself in a down state of mind can cause low self-esteem and can help produce depression.
• Visit with family members and friends you trust and love. Allow them to care for you while you go through this tough time. Family and friends may be able to detect if you are exhibiting depression symptoms.
• Depression can create behaviors that can continue a negative ripple effect in your life even after the divorce is final. Take time to research good therapists. If you know of family and friends who have consulted with excellent professionals dealing with divorce and depression, get his or her number. Take a step towards speaking with someone who understands how divorce can affect someone's life and who is able to identify depression symptoms. Just remember to be honest. A therapist, psychiatrist, doctor, or clergy person cannot fully help you if you buffer your true feelings.
• Understand that no one is perfect. Divorce can trigger depression and it becomes easier to blame yourself over things that you had no control over. Mulling over incidents and situations throughout the course of your marriage may not help you recover but send you into a deeper sense of helplessness, vulnerability, and guilt.
• Give yourself time to recuperate from your divorce. Learning a new hobby or sport can help you fill empty pockets of time that can make you feel depressed. Taking time to enjoy something new can help you ease yourself back into life's normality.

Divorce can be one of the most difficult times a person may have to endure in life. Spotting symptoms and behaviors you do not consider normal for yourself is a great first step. Reaching out to someone who can help you while you get through your divorce and your depression is another successful step.